August 22, 2006

I couldn't escape Springfield's gravitational pull for a second straight Fall, but its been very fulfilling thus far. Spiritually, I think this weekend has touched my soul. I have a resident advisor and resident director just aching to castrate me. Why? Well lets rehash my opening weekend events here in the Field. Unfortunately, I'm a nice boy who keeps bad company. And it just so happens my company visited this weekend for an argumentative musical event. One visitor passed out in the courtyard outside my RA's apartment on Friday. "Hi everyone! My name is Joe! I'm so happy to be here on campus! Can I drop a drunkard on your head? Wow, thanks!!!"

There was no exception Saturday, but it was me the drunkard who carried tray of Jell-O shots around campus. I wasn't aware I couldn't do that. I guess its to shelter and stunt the social growth of certain underagers. I have also recently learned that UIS is one of three participants in a brand new IL State Police pilot program targeting underage drinking. Apparently any underager caught drunk will be reprimanded, but a full scale investigation will ensue to find the person who gave them alcohol. I didn't think this campus could suck any harder, but it just became Mega Maid from Spaceballs.

ETHNIC UPDATE: curry sucks. It disgusts only those who don't have a chance to bathe in it. I'm not from India, but one of my roommates is. I think he has curry scented soap because it smells like sweaty Indian bung in my apartment when he's here. I have developed my own task force to counter his Curry Offensive. It involves surprise power hours at 11pm on random Tuesdays or Wednesdays, building a two story beerbong to do from the upper level of my apartment, and taking sour poops in the bathroom we share. Only time will crown a victor.

I haven't started my job or classes yet, but since they're destined to suck, I'll have more later.